Friday, June 17, 2011
Heartache
Today my heart is aching. My heart aches for music therapy, my heart aches for hospice work. I’m hitting my professional paper pretty hard, as I have 7 weeks to get it finished. The more engrossed I become in hospice literature the more I desire to work there. I have always desired to work in hospice, since I did a practicum there in 2007. But as I have gone down the professional paper road, the desire has become stronger and stronger. Will I never be able to work in hospice? I know that God will grant us the desires of our heart... I know that God will provide what is best for me at His chosen time. But I am human and I am weak, and some days I weep from the heartache. Some days I become angry that I cannot work in a field that I love so much. I know that God has great plans for me, I know that He teaches and strengthens through our suffering and trials. I also know that I am so extremely blessed. I have an absolutely AMAZING husband who loves me and cares for me unconditionally. I have amazing friends and family that support me and love me. Both my husband and I are in good health, he has a great job, we have money to pay for an apartment, bills, food, cars, and my graduate school. Please pray for me friends, that I can focus my blessings, that I will continue to have strength and trust in the God and His plan for me even on days like this.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
More work
So now that the wedding is over I should have lots of free time to relax before heading back to school next week....WRONG! There is still sooo much to do! Got most of the thank you cards written. Josh and I have been cleaning and rearranging the apartment to try to accomdate our new dishes and gifts. We are getting rid of our college plastic dishes! Woohoo!! The process of changing my name is really extensive as well. Yesterday I sat for an hour at DPS and an hour at the social security office to get those changed over. I also spent about an hour on the phone with the car insurance people to get all of that squared away. Hopefully Josh will get off early one day this week so we can get our bank account set up. Still so much work to do! The cats have been freaking out a little bit. I think they think we are moving again with all the boxes and packing and unpacking! Other than that things are great! :)
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Wedding!
Our wedding was absolutely wonderful! I thought I would share with you guys a few pictures our friends took!
The whole day was just amazing! During the Mass after Josh and I said our vows we were kneeling and we looked at each other and said, "Woah, did we just get married?!" It went by so fast, but it was so fun!
We both feel so incredibly blessed to be able to get married surrounded by our friends and family! I don't think we can ever say thank you enough for everyone's love, support, gifts, prayers, and generosity!
The weather was absolutely perfect that day, the Mass was beautiful, the music was amazing and the reception and dance was so wonderful and fun!
We went to the Bahamas for our honeymoon, which was an adventure that I will save for another day!
Friday, May 13, 2011
My career journey
I love music therapy. Music therapy has my heart. I have my MT-BC credential. Im getting a Master's in Music Therapy...so why am I also getting a Master's in Counseling? For several reasons.
The first time I considered doing the dual master's program was during my undergrad coursework. I don't even remember what course I had to read this article in, but it definately made an impact on me: Levels of Therapy: The Classification of Music Therapy Goals by Barbara Wheeler. I realized that what I really wanted to do would require some additional training.
Then I did my internship and was touched by a child who had experienced some severe trauma in her life. The trauma was pretty obviously the cause for the developmental delays.But since it was in a school district the focus was academics and language. Nevermind the fact that she had been working on these academic goals for 3 years without much improvement. We were not allowed to address any trauma and the school district was not addressing the trauma either. It broke my heart. I also realized that with my undergrad training as a MT processing the extreme trauma would have been outside my scope of practice. I also realized that I wanted to be able to do "deeper therapy."
My first jobs as a music therapist were.....pretty awful. I will not go into the specifics, but they were pretty horrific. I quickly burned out. Looking back, it still the events still make me sad. It also makes me sad, that there are many MT-BCs who have similar experiences. Why is that? Music therapy is such an amazing and beautiful therapy. Why do so many of us have to defend what we do day in and day out to parents, teachers, adminstrators, legislators, friends, doctors, OTs, etc. etc. you get the idea. Why are there mostly companies that don't pay fair wages or force us to have sessions in closets? I could go on and on, but I will stop there.
As I have gone through the counseling program, I really enjoy counseling. It is the "deeper" therapy I wanted but I miss the music. I so much miss the music. Unfortunately the dual program only allows the integration of MT and counseling in the last internship, so I have spent the last 3 semesters without music therapy. This summer is my last internship!! I am excited to see how I can integrate music therapy into counseling!
While I am excited to see how I will incorporate the two disciplines, I cannot put aside my passion. My professional paper is a comparison of hospice music therapy articles and hospice counseling articles. I read these articles and some days my heart really yearns to be able to work in hospice, to be a music therapist. Today is one of thos days. Maybe one day I will work in hospice as a music therapist. Maybe not, maybe I will be a counselor that incoporates music therapy into my counseling practice....
I leave you with this: Music therapy provides something very desirable in a hopeless or extremely unpleasant and undesirable situation. Music therapy has always been a profession in which its practitioners 'stand in the gap' to accomplish what cannot be done better in any other way. Music therapy interventions go far beyond the music heard on the television or a radio at a bedisde, sometimes referred to by nurses as 'music therapy.' When implemented by a skilled professional, music therapy contributes markedly to physical, psycholgoical, social, and cognitive functions for those requiring interventions. -Alicia Ann Clair
The first time I considered doing the dual master's program was during my undergrad coursework. I don't even remember what course I had to read this article in, but it definately made an impact on me: Levels of Therapy: The Classification of Music Therapy Goals by Barbara Wheeler. I realized that what I really wanted to do would require some additional training.
Then I did my internship and was touched by a child who had experienced some severe trauma in her life. The trauma was pretty obviously the cause for the developmental delays.But since it was in a school district the focus was academics and language. Nevermind the fact that she had been working on these academic goals for 3 years without much improvement. We were not allowed to address any trauma and the school district was not addressing the trauma either. It broke my heart. I also realized that with my undergrad training as a MT processing the extreme trauma would have been outside my scope of practice. I also realized that I wanted to be able to do "deeper therapy."
My first jobs as a music therapist were.....pretty awful. I will not go into the specifics, but they were pretty horrific. I quickly burned out. Looking back, it still the events still make me sad. It also makes me sad, that there are many MT-BCs who have similar experiences. Why is that? Music therapy is such an amazing and beautiful therapy. Why do so many of us have to defend what we do day in and day out to parents, teachers, adminstrators, legislators, friends, doctors, OTs, etc. etc. you get the idea. Why are there mostly companies that don't pay fair wages or force us to have sessions in closets? I could go on and on, but I will stop there.
As I have gone through the counseling program, I really enjoy counseling. It is the "deeper" therapy I wanted but I miss the music. I so much miss the music. Unfortunately the dual program only allows the integration of MT and counseling in the last internship, so I have spent the last 3 semesters without music therapy. This summer is my last internship!! I am excited to see how I can integrate music therapy into counseling!
While I am excited to see how I will incorporate the two disciplines, I cannot put aside my passion. My professional paper is a comparison of hospice music therapy articles and hospice counseling articles. I read these articles and some days my heart really yearns to be able to work in hospice, to be a music therapist. Today is one of thos days. Maybe one day I will work in hospice as a music therapist. Maybe not, maybe I will be a counselor that incoporates music therapy into my counseling practice....
I leave you with this: Music therapy provides something very desirable in a hopeless or extremely unpleasant and undesirable situation. Music therapy has always been a profession in which its practitioners 'stand in the gap' to accomplish what cannot be done better in any other way. Music therapy interventions go far beyond the music heard on the television or a radio at a bedisde, sometimes referred to by nurses as 'music therapy.' When implemented by a skilled professional, music therapy contributes markedly to physical, psycholgoical, social, and cognitive functions for those requiring interventions. -Alicia Ann Clair
Friday, May 6, 2011
Shoes
So today I attempted to find the perfect pair of shoes to wear on my wedding day....this was my 3rd attempt. I must confess that I absolutely HATE shoe shopping. This is for 2 reasons: 1. I wear a size 7 and have extremely narrow feet. This means that most shoes do not fit my feet. If they are narrow enough they are usually too small and too wide if they are long enough. 2. I cannot walk in heels. I have tried to learn, I really have, walked around the living room and read extensive articles about the art of walking in heels. The problem is that I am extremely clumsy and have very little balance standing flat foot. This is also the reason that I do yoga in my home from a video and not at a gym or yoga place...but I digress. Back to shoes...so I can wear a small heel and by small I mean 1 inch or less. The quest to find wedding shoes is also slightly complicated because I refuse to wear plain white shoes despite my mother and josh's requests! I also will be spending the entire day in these shoes...this IS a Mexican wedding...so they need to be somewhat comfortable, or at least tolerable for 9 hours. Also since there will be lots of dancing I don't want sandals or open-toe shoes. I learned from my quinceanerra that my toes need a little protection from my drunk relatives! :p My mom and I found a SUPER cute pair of sparkly shoes a few weeks ago. The problem is that they are flats and so when I put them on with my dress, my dress dragged on the floor and I tripped. Not really the way I want to walk down the aisle. So there you have it, I need shoes with a small heel, covered toe, not plain white (or black or beige), cute, size 7, narrow, and comfortable. Now is that really too much to ask for? I think I might have found a pair, after going to about 8 stores. I showed them to Josh and he said "you are such a hippie." I hope they work...mom will be up next weekend and I will try the shoes with the dress then for my bridal pics. Keeping my fingers crossed.
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